My poor, neglected blog. Not even a month old and already abandoned.
It hasn’t been intentional. Sometimes you just push those want-to-dos further and further down your list in order to make time for all of the have-to-dos and the next thing you know? It’s too late and the deadline has passed. Or at least that’s my excuse.
I almost convinced myself I was too late to write something for my brand-spankin’-new blog here and gave up altogether. Silence is what came to mind when I finally took the time to sit down and write–I figured that was my punishment. We’re talking crickets, people. Where you’ve got all these words in your head, thoughts you’re buried beneath, opinions and positions and declarations you’re dying to “download” to clear the pipes and all, but when those eight fingers line up on home row to crap out all that’s been festering in your brain for the last month… you’ve got nuttin’. Just like that, the words are gone. POOF!
Can I just tell you I really hate it when that happens?
Write every day, they say. Write something. Write anything. Write, write, write.
Well, Houston–that’s kind of a problem. My want-to-do is a wee bit stuck because all of my have-to-dos use up pretty much everything I’ve got to offer. I’m a mom with two kids (ten and four), a part-time job, a side job, a husband that travels a lot, a house to clean, meals to make, places to go, a mom’s group I help lead… You might laugh and say “Mommy Brain” is just a myth but I put a jug of detergent in the fridge the other day and poured my super healthy, so-very-nutritious powdered cheese into a boiling pan of water right after I dumped in all of the uncooked noodles. Last I checked, that wasn’t the right way to make dinner and I still don’t know where I put the detergent after I found it in the fridge and took it out!
I’m not making excuses here–I’ve seriously lost half my marbles!
It doesn’t help that May’s schedule is like December’s–only on crack. And with better weather. Amped up on end-of-year school activities, dance recitals, competitions, rewards ceremonies… it never ends! Apparently, neither does my inability to keep it all straight. I may or may not have neglected a few of my have-to-dos this past month and paid dearly for the error with a swift kick to my pride as a mother. Last minute teacher gifts for the win! That is, for the teacher I remembered to purchase a gift for in enough time. For the other one, I am so sorry. I had no idea today was the last day of school.
All this to say… life is about balance.
Sometimes you have the words, other times you don’t.
Sometimes you can make a rockin’ pot of mac-and-cheese, other times… well… notsomuch.
Sometimes you meet the deadlines you want to meet and other times you only meet those you have to. And even then? You’re bound to miss a few here and there. Just bein’ real. That’s life. I’m learning that it’s what you do with those missed deadlines that counts.
A couple of personal blogging deadlines I’d set for myself passed by me two and three weeks ago. No big deal–right now I’m the boss in this author/entrepreneurial gig, I can both punish and pardon if I want. But without the right balance, I might as well throw in the towel because writing, like so many other aspects of life, requires equal parts expectation and grace.
In a world overrun with deadlines–summer camp forms to turn in, fees to pay, orders to place, meetings to schedule, appointments to attend, chapters to write–the last thing I probably need is another deadline. But I’ve set two more and I’m proud of that. I don’t ever want to lose the drive to do more, be more, live more, win more at the same time I’m throwing out and accepting grace for the times when I inevitably fall behind.
I pretty much suck at it, so I have decided to pardon my lack of consistent blogging on my dear, sweet baby blog with a pint of Halo Top ice cream because a) May has been rough and b) I just want ice cream. And as for punishment, I will be clacking these laptop keys all weekend long in an effort to re-write the first half of my story, fighting for my dream with blood, sweat, tears and words. Lots of words.
Eh, who am I kidding? Balance schmalance. Writing’s not a punishment at all.
That cheese-flavored noodle water, though… that’s enough to get anyone’s head back in the game.
This time, I won’t be missing any deadlines.